Sunday, May 23, 2010

JEEZUZ KRAIST


Jesus is here. About damn time! The New Testament is where God stops punishing and starts being nice God who loves everybody. Mark starts us off in the baptism of Jesus just because and now I'll summarize the next four chapters in one sentence. Jesus heals a crap bunch of people. Yeah that's all. Good night folks.

Don't worry. I wouldn't leave you hanging there. Anyways, whether it's paralysis or leprosy, he heals them. And because of this, Jesus gets a lot of stalkers. And they all wanted to touch him. Um, this got strange. Well, he then tells the people a story about how a seed will only grow in fertile land. This was a metaphor of how people will only flourish if they are "rooted" on the word of God. And something led to another and they were on a boat. *Insert I'm on a Boat reference here* Then a random storm strikes but is calmed by Jesus. One would think this boat incident would be big but it was literally like four lines.

And just a random thought: "And they came over unto the other side of the sea, into the country of the Gadarenes. And when he was come out of the ship, immediately there met him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit, Who had [his] dwelling among the tombs; and no man could bind him, no, not with chains: Because that he had been often bound with fetters and chains, and the chains had been plucked asunder by him, and the fetters broken in pieces: neither could any [man] tame him. And always, night and day, he was in the mountains, and in the tombs, crying, and cutting himself with stones."(Mark 5:1-5) So apparently, emos are possessed by Satan. That's good to know.

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